Have you ever heard of the term ‘VOC Parenting’? This parenting style has become widely known through social media; it refers to the VOC (Vereenigde   Oostindische Compagnie), characterised by an authoritarian and rather rigid leadership style. This concept has since come to be associated with a parenting style that focuses on control and discipline.

Gentle Parenting, on the other hand, is the exact opposite; this parenting style prioritises a gentle, emotional approach from parents towards their children. This parenting style helps children develop not only physically, but also cognitively, emotionally and socially.

Authoritarian Upbringing vs Emotional Approach

Children raised using VOC Parenting are usually disciplined and respectful of their parents; however, it is not uncommon for children to grow up feeling fearful, struggling to express their feelings, and developing a less harmonious relationship with their parents due to this authoritarian parenting style.(http://alodokter.com/parenting-voc-kenali-ciri-ciri-dan-dampaknya-bagi-anak)

On the other hand, children raised using the Gentle Parenting approach tend to experience positive benefits for their growth and development. This parenting style, which prioritises an emotional approach and two-way communication, can help children grow up with low levels of anxiety and strong social skills. However, Gentle Parenting requires a great deal of time and effort as it demands consistency and patience. (https://www.parents.com/parenting/better-parenting/style/what-is-gentle-parenting/#toc-what-are-the-benefits-of-gentle-parenting)

“So, What Is the Right Parenting Style?”

Proverbs 22:6 “Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not depart from it.”

Parents are there not only to teach discipline and respect, but also to guide their children to live in truth, honesty and the fear of the Lord. Whether it is VOC Parenting or Gentle Parenting, if it is not practised with love, it will be a failure and a futile approach to parenting.

The most appropriate approach to parenting for a Christian family is to provide spiritual and moral education from an early age as a strong foundation for the child to continue walking in the right path throughout their life. Parents have a great responsibility to guide their children with wisdom and love, just as God guides His people.